Alternative Home Arrangement: Divorced Parents Rotate Living Spaces to Minimize Child Relocations
Diving into the unconventional world of co-parenting, one woman, Susan, decided to shake things up after her divorce. Exhausted by the constant packing and moving her children back and forth between homes, she and her ex-hubby made a bold move: letting the kids keep the family house while they take turns moving in and out.
In the dominion of Instagram, Susan documented her unique journey as @sparklysusan. She proudly announced their decision, "Working through an amicable divorce means we get to think outside the box. What really works best for our family? We realized keeping the kids in their same home is a top priority."
Orchestrating the logistics was no simple task, with both parents migrating to different quarters when not in the family pad. However, the financial perks largely overshadowed the initial hurdles. Said Susan candidly, "It was scary at first, figuring out logistics, each finding a room to rent. But it was also way cheaper than two houses big enough for six people."
The unexpectedly pleasant consequence? Her children's lives were far less disrupted than they'd be otherwise. "Every time I have to pack my stuff and haul it to the car, I'm so thankful it’s me doing this instead of the kids,” she shared, her gratitude palpable.
The arrangement they landed on – a "2 2 5 5" custody schedule – became her favorite. With each parent getting two days per week, weekends alternated. Essentially, Susan would have the kids for five days in a row before passing them off to her ex.
This innovative setup is referred to as "birdnesting" or "nesting." Born from the observation of bird parents who keep their youngsters safe in a nest and rotate caring for them, the concept essentially enables children to remain in the family abode while parents take turns.
Maddy Savage, a BBC correspondent, explained the blossoming popularity of birdnesting, especially among middle-class families in the United States, Australia, and the Netherlands. In Sweden, where equal child custody has been customary for decades, some divorced parents have even been rotating homes since the 1970s.
Despite initial discomfort for the parents, it's all about making sure the kids remain comfortable and feel safe in the process. "Kids need consistency," Susan reiterated in another video. "I am just a strong believer in [letting] the adults work through the chaos and [letting] the kids have just as much normalcy and consistency as possible. They only get one childhood – let's make it the best that we can."
- In an attempt to bring stability to her children's lives after the divorce, Susan adopted a unique approach to co-parenting called birdnesting, where the children remain in the family house while parents take turns moving in and out.
- By documenting her journey on Instagram, Susan, aka @sparklysusan, shared how their decision, revolving around keeping the kids in their same home, was a top priority for the family's health and wellness.
- Financial benefits were a significant draw for Susan and her ex-husband as they navigated the new lifestyle of birdnesting, which proved to be less expensive than maintaining two separate houses.
- Prioritizing her children's family dynamics and relationships, Susan was grateful that they were spared the disruptive experience of constant packing and moving, with the 2 2 5 5 custody schedule providing a semblance of normality.
- This innovative birdnesting arrangement, inspired by the behavior of bird parents who rotate caring for their young, has become increasingly popular among middle-class families across the United States, Australia, and the Netherlands, with evidence of its practice dating back to the 1970s in Sweden, where equal child custody is customary.
