Child Struggling with Nightmares? Understanding Nightmares' Traits and Ways to Offer Support
Sleeping in a sweat-drenched mess? You're not alone. Whether it's a freaky dream or a real-life horror, a night like that can leave you feeling unsettled, even if you're aware it's not a true threat. But when your kiddo experiences the same, it can feel like a never-ending nightmare.
The frustrating part? Kids having nightmares is pretty common. Up to half of all kids might experience them at some point. So, now that we've got that out of the way, let's dive in and understand why these nightmares keep creeping up, and how you can help your little one find some sleep-induced peace.
We turned to pediatric psychologist Catrina Litzenburg, PhD, for her insight on helping your child conquer their nightmarish dreams.
When Do Nightmares Strike?
The pediatric sleep council tells us that babies might not actually dream the night away. When a baby cries out during the night, it's usually just because they've woken up and need help getting back to sleep. But as kids grow, nightmares can start popping up.
What we do know for sure is that young children have more slow-wave sleep - the deep sleep stage, compared to adults. It's during this sharp snooze that night terrors (or sleep terrors) are more likely to happen. Like nightmares, your child won't remember their sleep terror, but they may cry out or scream. Unsurprisingly, they won't be easily soothed by your comforting words or hugs.
Why Do Kids Have Nightmares?
Remember when you'd hit the sack, only to spend the night facing your deepest fears? Well, your kiddo might experience something similar. Sleep, believe it or not, is a time when the brain is working hard to process the day's events, consolidate memories, and even clear away toxins built up during the day. That kind of behind-the-scenes work can sometimes cause some intensely vivid dreams.
Nightmares are more common when your child is:
- Anxious
- Scared
- Tired
- Stressed
- Dealing with trauma
As your child grows older, their nightmares might start to reflect the stressors in their lives more directly - think negative experiences or school troubles that weigh heavy on their little hearts.
How Can You Help Your Child Overcome Nightmares?
1. Make It Clear What's Real and Fake
Younger kids might have a hard time telling reality from their dreams. Given their small age, it's like convincing them that Santa doesn't really exist. Nightmares can be incredibly intense, making it hard for little ones to separate fact from fiction.
To help your child understand that their dreams aren't real, remind them throughout the day that nightmares aren't happening. For example, you can say things like, "Nightmares can be really scary, but it's not actually happening. You're safe in your bed and in your bedroom."
2. Prioritize Sleep
If your kid is running on too little sleep, their chances of having a nightmare can skyrocket. Make sure your child has a consistent sleep schedule based on recommendations for how much sleep kids need age-wise. (You can find some fantastic kids' sleep tips if you need a bit of guidance navigating the lukewarm waters of bedtime routines, bedtime strategies, and keeping kids in bed).
3. Encourage Independence
When your little one is afraid, you might feel the urge to climb into bed with them and give them the comfort they need. Hooking up a bed-sharing session might seem like the loving thing to do, but it can reinforce the idea in your kid's mind that their room isn't safe. Instead, stay in their room for a little while to help them relax and fall back asleep, but try your best to keep them in their bed.
4. Offer Comfort Objects
Your child might insist that they can't sleep unless you're in the room, but that might not be what they truly need. Offer an object they can snuggle up to instead, like a stuffed animal or blanket, to help them feel safer. Something that smells like you can also serve as a comforting reminder.
When Should I Worry About My Child's Nightmares?
If your child's nightmares are messing with their daytime activities, school performance, or social interactions, it's probably time to talk to their pediatrician or another healthcare professional. Your gut is usually right when it comes to your child's needs, so don't hesitate to reach out to a healthcare provider if you're concerned your child's nightmares are causing problems.
- In the realm of health and wellness, understanding the causes of nightmares in children is crucial for parents to help their kids find peaceful sleep.
- A child's nightmares can be influenced by factors such as anxiety, stress, tiredness, and even trauma. It's important to ensure a child's nightmares aren't interfering with their education, daytime activities, or social interactions, and to consult a healthcare professional if needed.
