Enduring the Tragedy of Losing a Mother: Strategies for Daughters to Cope Effectively
In the wake of losing a mother, it's natural to feel a myriad of emotions. According to a study, grief can lead to increased chances of cancer, cardiac issues, immune disorders, and high blood pressure. It's also associated with depression and a compromised sense of self in young adults.
The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (5th ed.) outlines a range of normal emotions in the year following parental loss, including regret, remorse, anxiety, guilt, emptiness, rage, anger, sadness, and numbness. These feelings can be particularly intense for daughters, who may feel the loss of family traditions, cultural knowledge, and maternal guidance, leaving them feeling lost and disconnected.
However, it's important to remember that everyone's experience with grief is unique. Some may find comfort in keeping up with traditions from their mother or starting their own. Honoring a mother's memory through goal-oriented activities, like donating to her favourite charity or achieving personal goals, can provide a sense of personal accomplishment.
Mindfulness, the ability to focus on the moment and not follow thoughts down an emotional path, can help manage painful memories related to the loss. It's also beneficial to focus on happy memories, such as pictures, books, or keepsakes.
If extreme grief persists for more than a year, or if daily tasks are difficult to complete, speaking with a mental health professional may be helpful. Local support groups, online chat forums, and the American Psychological Association's Psychologist Locator can provide assistance throughout the grieving process.
Books like "Healing After the Loss of Your Mother: A Grief & Comfort Manual", "Motherless Daughters: The Legacy of Loss", and "How to Survive the Loss of a Parent: A Guide for Adults" may offer additional support.
It's also worth noting that the effects of losing a mother may differ between daughters and sons, due to variations in emotional dependency, socialization patterns, and gender-specific coping mechanisms. Daughters might experience more profound identity and attachment disruptions, while sons might show different behavioral or emotional responses influenced by societal expectations.
Offering maternal support to others who have experienced parental loss can become an important part of their journey with grief. Maternal figures can come in various forms, and finding another source of maternal support can help retain feelings of guidance and understanding.
If you're experiencing unbearable grief, immediate help is available through the 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, Crisis Text Line, or other helplines worldwide. Remember, it's okay to ask for help during this difficult time.
In the end, the loss of a mother can mean the loss of an important part of your support system. But, with time, understanding, and support, it's possible to navigate through this challenging period and find a new path forward.
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